I never have anything to talk about.

Personally, I think tying garbage bags around your head and hands is overkill.

I wish you a tolerable Thursday. That's all any of us can hope for.

I'd like to run for office someday, but I'm afraid my ability to spell might give me an unfair advantage.

I have found that many other countries will buy off on anything American. As much as they hate us, they want to be us more than anything.

Orphans, dead parents, lonely children at Christmas, morose spoken word recordings, everything you love about the holidays. Move the turkey over so you can fit your head in the oven.

I always like to get local music when I'm in another country.