New York was the glamorous town that you only see now in old movies and on Broadway stages. The sky was lit up with dancing neon signs. It was safe to walk out in the streets.

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.

While my friends were discussing Pearl Harbor as the country's problem, I took it personally. It dawned on me that the Japanese attack could be my ticket out of high school.

The best way to clean up a son's room is to close the door and pretend it's not part of the house.

The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.

On the whole I woke up in the morning and was happy to be alive.

I like champagne because it always tastes as though my foot's asleep.