I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.

I look at life as being cruise director on the Titanic. I may not get there, but I'm going first class.

War for most men is not fighting or marching in parades. It is sitting around somewhere wondering what the hell you are supposed to be doing.

... I could have said something profound, but you would have forgotten it in 15 minutes - which is the afterlife of a graduation speech.

On the whole I woke up in the morning and was happy to be alive.

Ascot is so exclusive that it is the only racecourse in the world where the horses own the people.

This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security.