The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.

I found a way for her to fall asleep, Paris Hilton, talk to herself.

I have a bad gambling problem. You're not in show business for 12 years and dress like this without a bad gambling problem.

For a degenerate like me, Vegas is like a walk down memory lane. Last time I went to Vegas, I went to my old coke dealer's kid's bar mitzvah.

I'm very resilient. The only thing I'm missing right now are abs.

A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.

When you did impressions on 'MADtv,' the producers gave you a Walkman that played huge sections of whatever movie was being parodied, with your character's catchphrases recorded on a loop. You'd wear this thing around during rehearsals and for a week listen to the voice you had to impersonate over and over again. It drove all of us crazy.