No one's trying to get with jugglers.

We've always been divided by some of these big political issues. It's fine. As long as we treat each other with respect and remember that ultimately, we're all Americans, we'll be fine.

I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.

I talk about stuff like my Blackberry, Lost, the internet, music, etc. so I guess that leads to the "nerd" moniker. But I don't get it that much to be honest. I guess its better than being labeled a "racist" comedian.

In this era, we have more choice than any group of people ever. When you are out at night, anyone in the universe can contact you instantly. Think about how crazy that is compared to even a few decades ago.

I write characters that are based on elements of people I know and experiences I've really had.

If your job was remotely interesting, there would be a show on A&E about it.