You are already broke and don't even know it.

If you're starting to lose your faith in the general intelligence of the American populous, there's nothing like them mistaking pop culture for Van Gogh as a sign that people still read their history books and care about art.

You are already broke and don't even know it.

Every man has problems that only life insurance can solve. In the young man’s case, the problem is to create cash; for the older man, to conserve it.

You haven’t done anything wrong. You just haven’t done anything, and that’s what’s wrong.

You know, a man's life is the most precious thing in the world, isn't it? So isn't it odd that a man will insure everything but his life?

Unfortunately, my career is increasingly leading me into rooms where everybody is funny.