The biggest asset you have is your earning capacity, and that depends entirely on your attitude.

I think I'm the funniest guy in a room full of unfunny people. Unfortunately, my career is increasingly leading me into rooms where everybody is funny. I'm the least funny person in a room full of funny people.

Life insurance is time. The time a man might not have. If he needs time, he needs life insurance.

You are already broke and don't even know it.

You haven’t done anything wrong. You just haven’t done anything, and that’s what’s wrong.

I think I'm the funniest guy in a room full of unfunny people.

I'm a lot happier in people's living rooms weekly than I think I would be if I was really, really relying on a movie career to keep me fulfilled and excited.