I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.

That's what show business is, sincere insincerity.

Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason... now I have a reason.

Did you ever notice that everyone in favour of birth control has already been born ?

Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.

Live everyday as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.

Do unto others, then run