I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.
Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason... now I have a reason.
Those hot pants of hers were so damned tight, I could hardly breathe.
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Live everyday as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.