But our country's equivalent of gritty reality is more like "Look out Sarge, he's got a shooter!"

This was my attempt to deter cold callers: "There's no past, there's no future, just one pulsating present... Please leave your message after the tone."

I'm a vegetarian, I'm not strict. I eat fish. And duck, but they're nearly fish aren't they.

It's not a beard, it's an animal I've trained to sit very still.

I'm English, and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise. Horrible chocolate; nasty little toy: a double-whammy of disillusionment! Sometimes I eat the toy out of sheer despair.

American rock has a sort of self-pitying whine to it.

Contentment is knowing you're right. Happiness is knowing someone else is wrong.