Joke number 1, I have a bit of a problem with jokes, bit of a handicap for a comedian obviously, um, I tend to bail out of the joke, I lose commitment in it, I'll give you an example: Three blokes go into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

This shed does not contain me.

Live comedy's a very reckless, foolhardy profession. You're only as good as your last gig so earnings fluctuate.

I never really thought comedy was a career option, just something I did for fun. Suddenly I realised I was getting paid which was a bonus. I studied for a diploma with the London College of Music, and teaching was something I thought I might do but comedy intervened.

So many beautiful things, I cannot possess them all!

Come to Belarus, where wild animals will steal your fruit

Talking of white supremacist violent types, I was in America, recently.