As much as Metallica rocked, they always had these song names... 'The Thing That Shouldn't Be'. 'The Chair That Wasn't There', you know?
Bill BurrI think I know how to raise a kid. You just play catch with 'em. You just talk about life, and you distract them by throwing the ball. They don't even notice that you're filling up their heads with your theories.
Bill BurrWhen I was coming up the DC Improv was considered the best Improv out there. It's always been high quality stuff coming out of there.
Bill BurrWell probably the coolest show of that whole tour was in Germany. I had a chunk of material on [Adolf] Hitler, and I was worried about how they'd react, but they loved it.
Bill BurrEveryone should just drive out to the Mojave Desert and just experience it, and it's a fun place to live.
Bill BurrIt was right after 9/11 and I decided to walk around the grounds of the Pentagon, because I had never been there. Out of nowhere comes this speeding camouflaged golf cart and this guy starts yelling at me, 'What do you think you're doing!' The guy wrote my name down and began to follow me before I got really scared and took off as fast as I could.
Bill Burr