Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of us.

Fathers are the geniuses of the house because only a person as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity.

In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.

There are certain times of the day when you need a balance - that is, your protein and your carbs. I'm a Barry Sears man. I believe that anything green is a carb, and I need 2:1. Two of the carbs to one of the protein.

There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.

The first-born in every family is always dreaming for an imaginary older brother or sister who will look out for them.

I'm not sure if my parents had me because they loved me, or because they wanted someone to watch their other children.