George Carlin is brilliant with words, and Johnny Winters is very creative. It's taking something common and drawing out the humor, being clever with words.

When I was a boy if a girl got pregnant the shame was placed on her and the boy could get away.

I didn't know how serious it is to a female that you lift the lid.

Our children are angry. The profanity is out in the street. It's on the buses and in the subway. Our children are trying to tell us something, and we are not listening.

What best defines a child is the total inability to receive information from anything not plugged in.

We parents ask dumb questions, therefore we get dumb answers.

My wife and I have five children and the reason why we have five children is because we do not want six.