A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.
There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.
A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first.
A Hoyo de Monterrey double corona is my favourite Cuban since Desi Arnaz.
When I decided that I wanted to go to college, I wanted to be a school teacher for 7th and 8th grade boys because I felt that was an important time for them. I had gone astray at that point in my life and really wanted to help keep them from making the same mistake I had made.