The childless experts on child raising also bring tears of laughter to my eyes when they say, I love children because they're so honest. There is not an agent in the CIA or the KGB who knows how to conceal the theft of food, how to fake being asleep, or how to forge a parent's signature like a child.

I don't wear no condom and I don't plan for no kids.

You'll have many, many friends, but if your relationship with your mate is one hundred per cent of your heart, you'll never need a friend.

Intellectuals are people who go to study things other people do naturally.

When I was a child, I was living in the housing projects of Philadelphia. I didn't even have a Christmas tree.

A baseball manager has learned a lot about his job from having played the game, but a parent has not learned a thing from having once been a child.

The first-born in every family is always dreaming for an imaginary older brother or sister who will look out for them.