People always snap and think they're Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they're Buddha?

I don't do drugs anymore... than, say, the average touring funk band.

I'm just skin covering coffee and some real nervous teeth.

I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.

On the theft of his material by Denis Leary: "I have a scoop for you. I stole his act. I camouflaged it with punchlines, and to really throw people off, I did it before he did."

I, like all artists in Western cultures, am a shaman...come in the guise of a comic...to heal perception by using...'jokes'.

Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let's put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.