I wish I could meet a Christian who would proselytize to me, but they keep running away from me. I wanna talk to you all.

And on the seventh day, god stepped back and said and said, "This is my creation, perfect in every way... oh, dammit I left all this pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it... Now I have to create Republicans."

Oh sorry, I was taking life seriously.

Isn't that weird, we've made nature against the law. That's how un-natural we've become.

I hate patriotism... I can't stand it. It's a round world last time I checked.

They proved that if you quit smoking, it will prolong your life. What they haven't proved is that a prolonged life is a good thing. I haven't seen the stats on that yet.

Just a simple choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as one.