Let's do some comedy. I always like to add some comedy to my show. Those who've seen me before might know that.

There is a 3rd point of view on the gun control issue - those who I refer to as THE VICTIMS - but they remain strangely silent.

Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye.

I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious.

It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy.

No one knows what it's like ... to be a dustbin ... in Shaftesbury ... with hooligans.

I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, 'My dad can beat up your dad.' I'd say 'Yeah? When?'