But where did this veneration of childbirth come from? I missed that meeting. Childbirth is wonderful, childbirth is a miracle. Wrong. It's no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out your ass.

There is a 3rd point of view on the gun control issue - those who I refer to as THE VICTIMS - but they remain strangely silent.

I go to dance clubs...about once a year just to justify the other 364 days I spend in my apartment going 'God, what idiots!'

To me, Texas is Austin, a bunch of cool people trying to make a difference.

My voice was not heard, the questions were not asked that I wanted to see asked.

'Where's Bill going?' He's going to comedy death. Boom! He pops out of it with another joke. It's my particular style.

I've been on what I call my UFO Tour, which means, like UFOs, I too have been appearing in small southern towns in front of a handful of hillbillies lately.