Rock stars against drugs--that's what we want, isn't it? Government-approved rock-n-roll? Woo! We're partying now!

Pornography is any act that has no artistic merit and causes sexual thoughts...Sounds like almost every commercial on TV to me.

It's not that I disagreed with Bush's economic policy... I believed he was a child of Satan here to destroy the planet.

The role of the comedian is to say 'Wait a minute' when a consensus starts to form.

I don't like anything in the mainstream and they don't like me.

The American dream is a crock. Stop wanting everything. Everyone should wear jeans and have three T-shirts, eat rice and beans.

Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. "I believe God created me in one day." Yeah, looks like he rushed it.