Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can't find your fags.

People in the United Kingdom and outside the United States share my bemusement with the United States that America doesn't share with itself.

I used to drink, I did, I had to quit. Man, I was an embarrassing drunk. I'd get pulled over by the cops, I'd be so drunk I'd be out dancing to their lights thinking I'd made it to another club.

Sometimes my dad even gets on this kick--'You hate this country'....I have to tell him...I just hate being lied to.

I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind's sole purpose on this planet.

I can't believe a war against drugs when they have anti-drug commercials on TV all day long followed by This Bud is for you.

Okay, I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready?