Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

Republicans look to find the future and they find radio.

The First Amendment was specifically designed for citizens to insult politicians. Libel laws were written to protect law students speaking out on political issues from getting called whores by Oxycontin addicts.

You're not a patriot unless even when you lose, it's still your country.

How can the Republicans get away with picking their Dennis Kucinich, but when - if the Democrats tried it, all hell would break lose?

I didn't really think a lot about religion, but I didn't really think a lot against it, either. I was one of those people who didn't go to church, but when I got in trouble I kinda pleaded with God - whoever that was.

Also, in the category of 'obvious but still shocking,' an animal called a 'killer whale' killed someone who was trying to play with it. Now, no one knows exactly what enraged the whale, but earlier in the week, it had been thrown off a flight by Southwest Airlines.