Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.

Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.

There's no problem so awful that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse!

If you don't get a goodnight kiss, you get Kafka dreams.

I hope some historian will confirm that I was the first cartoonist to use the word 'booger' in a newspaper comic strip.

Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines. Hobbes: Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.

The way Calvin's brain is wired, you can almost hear the fuses blowing.