Why are there no windows in the toilets on aeroplanes? To protect you from the most dedicated perverts on the planet, hanging off the wing to get a peep?

Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.

When you involved in an accident and someone asks "are you alright?" Yes fine thanks, I'll just pick up my limbs and be off.

Now, the country is in a terrible state, and you've blamed it on a number of things: Unemployment rate, the value of the pound and all that... wrll, it's because the national anthem is boring.

It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.

Politically correct is the language of cowardice.

If you don't know how to meditate at least try to spend some time every day just sitting.