I'd always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.

Did your mother never tell you not to drink on an empty head?

On George W Bush: That man sits at that desk in the White House with the button that can end the world. My father's younger than him and we don't give him the controls for the television.

Try to catch a trout and experience the glorious feeling of letting it go and seeing it swimming away.

I don't believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don't want to say I don't believe in God, but I don't think I do. But I believe in people who do.

It's my mind, and I reserve the right to change it as often as I like.

Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he think he was doing at the time?