What always staggers me is that when people blow their noses, they always look into their hankies to see what came out. What do they expect to find?

I still do my comedy and my performance stuff and my acting so it's not all-consuming. But I do find myself drawing more and more these days.

I'm a big fan of the Mars Bar Diet. You don't eat the Mars bar, you stick it up your arse and let a rottweiler chase you home.

The world needs more Edwin Morgans, people who can take the language and swing it round their heads and don't care what you think.

A lot of people are too easily offended. Religious people, for instance. They've been offending other people for centuries.

People die all the time. It's just that you're not around.

Tread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.