My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.

The only time I would like to see was the 20s and 30s in America because I love the music and the style and the optimism, I wanted to see New York being built. I wanted to see all that, you know.

Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet.

Sex therapist claims that the most effective way to arouse your man is to spend 10 minutes licking his ears!! Personally, I think its bollocks!!

I loathe hecklers. I haven't got a good syllable to say. When you come out of the club circuit and into the concert hall, they should be gone. There's an element of manners that should tell you that the ticket is dear and it's a different venue.

Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he think he was doing at the time?

I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.