If you want to lose a bit of weight, don't eat anything out of a bucket.

I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a rotten word because it makes you think you are useless.

Don't tell me how to do my job. I don't come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up.

I set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce.

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?

If you don't know how to meditate at least try to spend some time every day just sitting.

Without arts programmes there's only reality TV, and reality TV needs the arts to show it what reality is.