Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.

Scotland has the only football team in the world that does a lap of disgrace.

I hate all those weathermen, too, who tell you that rain is bad weather. There's no such thing as bad weather, just the wrong clothing.

If I had a hammer, there'd be no more folksingers.

Now, the country is in a terrible state, and you've blamed it on a number of things: Unemployment rate, the value of the pound and all that... wrll, it's because the national anthem is boring.

I don't like the beach. I think we have no business at the beach at all, as a species. We don't belong in the sea. The sea is full of things that bite us, sting us, hurt the soles of our feet, and it's extremely cold. When are we gonna take the hint that the things that live in the sea don't like us?

I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be.