A well-balanced person has a drink in each hand.
I was brought up a Catholic, for that you get an A level in guilt.
I love fishing. It's transcendental meditation with a punchline.
My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.
Now, the country is in a terrible state, and you've blamed it on a number of things: Unemployment rate, the value of the pound and all that... wrll, it's because the national anthem is boring.
I don't aim to offend.