A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
It gave dirty politics a bad name.
The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie. And an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark...
It flies so high, I swear I heard the organs playing.
It's amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn't sell theirs threw them away.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.