If they liked you, they didn't applaud -- they let you live.

You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor's age by the rings on her fingers.

My folks were English. They were too poor to be British. I still have a bit of British in me. In fact, my blood type is solid marmalade.

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.

I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.

I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, 'What do I do next?' Pat replied, 'Wait till the pain dies down.'

I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there.