I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
The only time to believe any kind of rating is when it shows you at the top.
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They're still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
My folks were English . . . we were too poor to be British.
The help (in Japan) is very polite. They bow so much, you don't know which end to talk to.