The audience was swell. They were so polite they covered their mouths when they yawned.
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
It's a wonderful way to live, and not a bad way to go, either. The average Frenchman is still smiling three months after he's dead.
I've always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It's an island and the audience can't run very far.
The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.
If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.