I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that I'll stay in the bar!

Golf's really fun in Japan because of the women caddies. ... I saw one guy start out playing alone with his caddie. By the 9th hole they were engaged and when they finished on 18 they had a foursome.

She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn't understand us at all.

She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.

At the Academy Award Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood gather around to see what someone else thinks about their acting besides their press agents.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he's not running for anything.