Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you're God's frozen people.

Foursomes have left the first tee there and have never been seen again. They just find their shoelaces and bags.

Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you will go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and, for no reason at all, you really stink.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan - Go for the Gold.

I do try to work out a little. I go swimming twice a day. It beats buying golf balls.

She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.