Perfume acts as an anesthetic. By the time she floats a little your way, you'll promise her anything.

I ruined my hands in the ring. The referee kept stepping on them.

Miniskirts have become quite a fad. They're even some guys wearing them. Don't laugh, if you had thought to of that, you'd not be here now.

The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he's not running for anything.

Somebody should tell Jerry Falwell that God is an Independent . . . he's not rich enough to be a Republican.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.