In England when you make a movie even the weather is against you. In Hollywood the weatherman gets a shooting schedule from all the major studios and then figures out where he can fit in a little rain without upsetting Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer too much.

It's amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn't sell theirs threw them away.

For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green

Seventy years of ad-lib material, and I am speechless.

I've always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It's an island and the audience can't run very far.

The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I've encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE - and a maid to press it for me.

Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.