Jack Benny really liked my book. I know because he called me up from the library and told me.

I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.

We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

I led such a sheltered life I didn't go out with girls until I was almost four.

You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.