You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.

Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.

I can't understand what's holding up our missile program. It's the first time the government ever had trouble making the taxpayers' money go up in smoke.

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water.

Now that the war is winding down, I want to say I do appreciate you fellows hanging around here - just for me.

English clubs are very exclusive. I played Royal Foxshire and they made me wear a suit and tie. . . in the shower.

I've been playing golf a long time, although it's not really true that on my first round they strapped my bag on the back of a dinosaur.