YOU CAN ONLY DO ONE THING AT A TIME SO CONCENTRATE ON IT.

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in.

Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it's also very exclusive. They had a very successful membership drive last month. They drove out forty members.

Please don't stand up on my account.

Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend's house during a power failure.

Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells 'Fore!' the guy he's hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.

There's a very apt saying in show business: "If you don't go over budget in Paris, you're either very rich or very sick. "