I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.

Sure, we did need the oil in America. How else could Dolly Parton get into some of her dresses?

It's a wonderful way to live, and not a bad way to go, either. The average Frenchman is still smiling three months after he's dead.

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty one.

I've always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It's an island and the audience can't run very far.

The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie. And an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark...

We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.