Milton Hope led the singing of Happy Birthday ... He would say, 'Keep it sweet and short and don't try to be funny.'

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him.

I can still chase women, only downhill

Contrary to what certain comedians have led you to believe, the national French pastime is picnicking.

Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.

Your ignorance cramps my conversation

I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.