Somebody should tell Jerry Falwell that God is an Independent . . . he's not rich enough to be a Republican.

After the 1984 Summer Olympics, Reagan wanted to add the U.S. volleyball team to his Cabinet. He figured if they can't shove his programs down Congress' throat, nobody can.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.

Television is the box they buried entertainment in.

Bing Crosby and I weren't the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other. One of our stock lines used to be "There's nothing I wouldn't do for Bing, and there's nothing he wouldn't do for me." And that's the way we go through life - doing nothing for each other!

Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.

We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.