I know I'm a sinner, but make me a winner!

When the inventor of the drawing board messed things up, what did he go back to?

My wife was fitted with a coil. For about 18 months I hated it! She used to pick up CB signals.

Dulwich College takes me back after seventy years: My Mum must have written one hell of a sick note!

I know I'm a sinner, but make me a winner!

I told them I wanted to be a comedian, and they laughed; I became a comedian, no one's laughing now

Growing old is compulsory - growing up is optional.