A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded: 'Take me to the canaries'.
I can remember when safe sex meant a padded headboard.
Where do the homeless have 90 per cent of their accidents?
I'd never be unfaithful to my wife for the reason that I love my house very much.
What do gardeners do when they retire?
A miniature village in Bournemouth caught fire and the flames could be seen nearly three feet away.