When the inventor of the drawing board messed things up, what did he go back to?
If blind people wear sunglasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs?
Where do the homeless have 90 per cent of their accidents?
Real happiness is when you marry a girl for love and find out later she has money.
I got a horse for my wife. I thought it was a fair swap.
It got up to 94 degrees today – that's pretty good at my age.