Sometimes I wish I hadn't said something foolish. It is then that I realize the power of mime.

What I have now are good problems of trying to decide and what I really want to do is good work next. My phone's ringing a lot more and I've got nine lines so when it doesn't ring, it's very frustrating.

What I've learned about comedy people is that they're defined by the harshest level they've been to, their personal Auschwitz.

Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he's a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored.

When someone you love is hurting, if it was possible, you'd want to take their pain for them. But do I really want cramps and sore boobs?

Sundays are a good day to look at the limitless possibilities of the week ahead. The key is to prolong that feeling by not reading the news.

I wouldn't hurt a flea. I'd finger a spider though.