Words matter. Especially if you're kicking someone's ass in words with friends.

Apparently my street has a leaf blower gang who tag team all day, so the sounds of the leaf blower are forever blowing from dawn to dusk.

I have a feeling I'm going to wake up one day and say 'I can't do dirty stuff anymore, I want to go all clean.' I'll do clean stuff too, I like to entertain people. Then they egged me on; we shot it at The Laugh Factory.

The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.

At the end of the day it's the end of the day.

My girlfriend just told me I am one of the smartest people she knows. I told her, You need to meet other people.

Around comics, I've always been known for, oh, that's not dirty, this is dirty.