There are no I's in we but there are two i's in Wii.

You learn who your friends are when you find out who will lie for you.

Think well of yourself and others will too. Unless those others are in government, banking, or show business.

A lot of people ask me what my favorite episode of Full House was, I always tell them: it was the last one!

Aristotle said, Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. Isn't that a three-way?

I can't do negative, needy, or narcissistic anymore. Oh wait, I can still do the last one, aw nuts.

Everyone I love I pay.